I so enjoyed being looked at. It was refreshing, sexy and made me feel masculine and handsome. Toronto is not a city where woman will openly and comfortably ‘check-you-out’. We are not a town where the men ogle woman with thoughts of romance and passion, as they may in France, but more so with a certain luscivious nature. So, rarely being the prize of a woman’s hunt in that way, was nice.

Do you find that women look at you? Do you find that men look at you? What city are you from? Is it a romantic city?

What has your experience been like in Toronto or otherwise. Does the opposite, or even better, same sex ‘check-you-out’. I’ve had some nice experiences with gay men asking after me. That was a compliment too. Do you look longingly at men or women?  Tell me about an experience you had where you were staring or stared at?

What stands out in your mind? What did you see while you were involved in a long look? Did anything come from that moment, of substance or otherwise?

I’ve been wondering what one of the greatest stares in history might have been. Of course i could google it but that would be no fun? Can you think of one – perhaps on film, or in your synagogue on the High Holidays (I am a junior spiritual leader at a local Temple, and it’s quite something to watch people watch people. If one could gauge the dynamic between people in the synagogue on the High Holidays - a place where most people attend 3 times a year - he/she would find great curiosity about others, and wonderment.

Do you like being stared at? Are you comfortable staring at a woman? A man? How long will you hold your stare? Let me know. Thanks.

P.S. Gilad Shalit is slated to come home on Tuesday (to Israel). There was a big price paid for his life, and its painful to consider how it affects so many other lives, but his return home is a simcha (celebration) unto itself. Whatever your thoughts about the Israel-Hamas deal, Gilad is coming home after 5 years. That is highly significant for everyone because we know somewhere in our mind that he was seperated from his family for 1800 days plus; and he was only a couple hundred miles away from them; and he was likely kept out of touch with anyone accept people who were prepared to kill him, if they needed to. We all know this, and explode with happiness for Gilad’s family, and of course for Gilad. God bless the entire planet tonight. Decisions are made every moment, it seems, that plays a major role in our lives. I often think that acting good, doing beautiful deeds, will create a line of dominoes that will run everywhere. Like you perhaps, I pray that evil can become good, and that good becomes better.

It seemed like he was attacked, beaten and brutally murdered. Do you think that’s okay? Were you happy to hear it?

Did you fnd yourself watching the video footage over and over? Although the news called the pictures gruesome did you just watch it over and over.

If you answered any of these questions ‘yes’, ask yourself if your response is simply a human one. I you answered ‘yes’ for two or more of these questions, ask yourself if you are surprised at your response for revenge and blood. Ask yourself if you believe, that if you were treated brutally for many yeras, you would be part of a group, a mob, of people who would join in beating its leader. what is your answer for all of this. There is much to say about the human condition.

A side of me was happy he was beaten and murdered. I put myself into check, reminding myself that I must show compassion for a very bad guy, because of who I am and what my belief system represents.

I don’t believe I would ever be part of a group of angry, revengeful people who would beat someone to death. I’ve felt huge anger for such people, but would never, at the end of the day, hurt such an individual. Would you? I heard many stories, about Survivors of the Holocaust who beat to death Nazis after the war (having seen them on the bus or in public places).

On the other hand, would I? Your thoughts.

My personal struggle to arrive at this juncture has been an arduous one. But now that I’m ‘here’ I realize how peaceful it is outside my doors; in fact howEden-like my city and country is. Clearly this is not a feeling or sense that everyone experiences. I work with the impoverished and know for many, every waking morning is hell on earth, having to be concerned with how to serve their children 3 meals that day.

The question: How peaceful is our life? How at ease is the country in which we live in? When your life gets to the point of having meaning, and you can walk through the parks and truly smell the fragrances, it is then, as well, when you should step up your response to the world and its ills? When someone lives inToronto, Canadaand has a ‘good’ life, how closely should they see the souls of the 3,000 children who have perished inSomaliabecause of the current famine?

We look for bliss our entire lives; purpose and meaning, but in a safe place. The wars that rage throughout the world do, often, because the goal of the fighters, at least one side, is to bring a similar type of peace to its citizens. How are we to act and respond once we’ve reached some level of personal and societal nirvana?

Ps. I ask this question, in part, because my people, the Jewish people, suffered during the Holocaust knowing that not enough citizens around the world were thinking about our struggle. The concentration camps were far far away from the consciousness. Knowing a famine is out there today; knowing I am going to my friends cottage today – a truly blissful place – should I adjust? Should I compartmentalize? Should I suffer more?

 2. Are you mostly proud your life so much so that you have little to hide from your children, family, friends?

 3. Do you like yourself, and how much? Is there someone else in the world you’d rather be?

I am looking for one (a synagogue, otherwise known as a shul; sometimes called a shteibel, when it’s little, perhaps a room in a home) that my son and I can attend and its not easy.

Our criteria are: 

a) A place for him to run around

b) Lots of kids for him to play with…or at least some.

c) A children’s service with meaning

d) A  place where I can grow spiritually.

We have checked out a few synagogues in Toronto and so far with little luck. The First Nurayver synagogue downtown was not for us as the ideology didn’t  fit. We liked Rabbi Spero’s shul in Kensington Market. The balcony was awesome and we arrived before everyone else so we had some time to look down on the shul and pretend we were super-Jews But alas, it’s too far and we will likely be drawn to the Rasta place next door or the funky stores with some grundgy fedoras for kids.

A few weeks ago, on Passover, my son and I went to Sha’arei Shomayim which was fine. There is lots of room for Noah to fly around; tons of kids and good kiddushes (the food after the service; paramount). I’m not sure it’s a place where I can grow spiritually as it might be to mainstream for my liking. We decided to try it because I grew up in a shul like that, in Kitchener – big and mainstrean. We’ll see.

Please let me know your thoughts on SCM hunting. What do you look  for? What have you found? Is there a funky place that just rocked your spiritual world and gave your child(ren) a chance to prance, play and pray?

Thanks, Avraham Father of Noah

2. Now that they are here, are you truly enjoying them?

3. Do you constantly think about going back to work?

4. What are you going to change in 2011 – if you are able to?

enjoy!

2. If you brought a pail of sand into your home do you suspect an ant would find a place on your floor?

3. Can a super-ego humiliate you?

4. Would you not steal if your child was hungry?

5. What is required to make amends for foisting invisibility on another person? Learning about your own invisibility, therefore your ability to inflict that on others. The process is long however a form of t’shuva.

In October, 2010 Lil Wayne, the rapper was charged with criminal weapon possession and criminal possession of a loaded weapon and sentenced to 1 year in jail. If you want to know how he’s doing in jail all you have to do is check out the following blog: http://weezythanxyou.com/ and his ESPN blog on sports.

Many of you must be thinking that something is terribly wrong when a convicted felon is able to send their fans messages from ‘inside’. You might be confused on how it is that Conrad Black, the erudite once Canadian media mogul sentenced to 6½ years in prison for his role in the misappropriation of millions of dollars (from the newspaper empire he once headed), is able to write for the National Post.  

Case in point, if you are curious about Mr. Black’s thoughts on the once again, another sexual molestation scandal in the Catholic Church all you have to do is click on: http://network.nationalpost.com/NP/blogs/fullcomment/archive/2010/03/27/conrad-black-this-too-shall-pass.aspx

How is it, you’re thinking, that two men who committed crimes that hurt others a lot, are able to  have such a good time on the internet and have the freedom to communicate to the world and their fans? Wound an accountant be given the freedom to do year-ends from the joint?

Times have changed. Incarceration no longer means what it once did, at least for the rich and famous. In the old days people of affluence or great success, would go off to jail and be hush and humble, especially after being labeled ‘disgraced’ by the newspaper they founded. They would just be locked away.

Oscar Wilde sentenced for ’gross indecency’ and while in Reading Prison, near London, prisoner C. 3.3 was not initially allowed paper and pen. (A later governor changed that).

Is it okay we are hearing from these men through their writings and blog posts? 

Should people sentenced to prison for very serious crimes know their place, and simply creep back into the room quietly once their sentences are over? At question is, why are these guys enjoying the luxury of stardom through their writings while serving their sentences, and should we be reading their articles and posts?

To answer the first question, first, Lil Wayne writes in a recent blog entry that he is doing well. He did not expound on what it was like in jail, at least not yet but there was an inflection in his words, heaviness, and a sort of contriteness in his script. He is in prison and which ever way you slice it he’s not walking far let alone performing.

Lil Wayne, a father  of four is serving time, behind bars that clank shut louder than his fans applauding him. He is locked away, far far away.

Like any prisoner everywhere Lil Wayne and Conrad Black are in jail and the food is likely comparable to the $2.96 lunch at Ikea, There are no places to hide and these men are the ‘property’ of warden, the guard and a couple hundred other guys. They are not free men. How well can they be doing?

Are they having a good time? I bet both of them would rather be anywhere but prison. Jail is not a great place. Ask an ex-convict. Look in their eyes. There you will see the clanking of the bars, and history of millions of men and women who spent years, if not their lifetime inside. Therein lays a brutal life not one which is luxurious or fun.

 Is it good for us to read Black’s and Wayne’s writings? Should we?

I think that both of these ‘criminals’ can do something significant through their writing while in jail. By this I mean, if Conrad Black and Lil Wayne were allowed to pen out articles and blog posts on such issues as: the penal  system: how to correct it, or who is suffering on the inside — that might be fine. That might be good.

I do not believe that Conrad should be writing about the Catholic Church. Aside from the fact that his credibility re churchly issues is not that sound right now, I think that Mr. Black should not be operating in his old ways – of pontificating about all and any issues. He does not seem to have the right. He writes in a way that has flair of superiority. That doesn’t seem appropriate now. He writes in a way that ‘he knows’ and we  don’t”. He’s in jail and we’re not. I think there is something he doesn’t get. In short, his journalism days about ethics, should be curtailed for as long as he is in the ‘unethics bin’.

I do not think that it is appropriate for Lil Wayne to be blogging to his fans as that is in of itself is a form of performance. He is benefiting monetarily by blogging by keeping his name ‘out there’. Further the fact he is writing as a sports commentator is truly undermining the severity of his crime. Guns are dangerous.  He was carrying one, loaded. He could have hurt of killed one or many people. His jail sentence is not a game. He shouldn’t be reporting on games, for exactly that reason.

(By the way both ESPN and the National Post have shown an incredible lack of integrity and respect for their industry and companies. These guys are in jail. They are not roving reporters. Where will their next reporters come from, Kingston Penitentiary?)

Conrad Black is a brilliant writer. Read his articles. Peruse his books. He has a fine grasp of the English language and is a very bright man, in many ways. Lil Wayne, because of his experiences harbors important wisdom about the street, hardships and the ability, despite challenges and the vagaries of his life, the possibility of rising to the top.

Image if these two men decided to share with us ideas about their fellow inmates and things we need to understand better about the penal system. It would be of great benefit, and make sense, if these two very talented men expressed their thoughts and feelings about life inside, helping we who are free appreciate the challenges to the prison population and the downside to our present penal system.

By speaking about others, by writing about those individuals who will never have the opportunities Conrad and Lil have, or will have, that will be an expression of their contriteness and a form of repairing the world. It just makes sense.

I think therefore, that we can all benefit from their time inside by learning from them, by reading their thoughts, about life in jail. I think too that we might have a really good chance here to learn something about the realities of prison, if Lil and Black would let us into that.

Should these two men be blogging and stating their views in national newspapers? Only if their words are expressing something about the people they are currently living with, and a system which needs fixing.

Conrad Black and  Lil Wayne are in prison and writing for us. Conrad is expressing his views on the church and other such ethical issues. Lil is letting us know football tips. Something about this just doesn’t feel right. I would be far more comfortable if the two of them began writing stuff about their life inside and those who will be there forever or less. Why aren’t they doing so? Why the selfishness? What are they learning from their experiences? Not what they could.

The two have a great chance to bring change to our world, the penal system more specifically, but don’t seem to be pursuing that route. They might want to be in jail, while they are in jail, or perhaps someone should tell them they are.

________________________________________________________________________

To be in touch with Lil Wayne, he sends us his contact information at

Write to Lil Wayne
Eric M. Taylor Center (EMTC)
Dwayne Carter NYSID# 02616544L
10-10 Hazen Street
East Elmhurst, NY 11370

You can also Free Weezy T-Shirts (with handcuffs or without)

Bizarre eh!?

Kids on Easter egg hunt find body in Iowa park

Girl arrested for doodling on desk to sue

Octopus served up in restaurant has 9 legs

Cafeteria worker stuck in dumbwaiter for hours

Calif. outdoors writer arrested in pot bust

$7.77M lottery payout after 7-7-7-7 hits

Girl, 14, dies after exorcism to treat convulsions

Question:

1) Why do we know to know this news?

2) Is it meant to be funny or quirky, or ‘did you know that’ type of thing? What’s funny about a girl dying? What’s quirky about it?

3) Are  we built  to take very much of this news? In other words our world in 2010 is so wired that we are privy to every piece of conceivable news going on in any town, inlet, village or major metropolitan centre. Is this as at all healthy? When  CNN  creates a synopsis out of these headlines what are they trying to teach  us, enlighten  us about?

4) Is this news? What is news?

Your thoughts?  Is CNN  and most other news outlet simply vying for your viewing minutes by shocking you out of your pants with stories that are deeply tragic but read as if they were a strange, bizarre story from eras ago, or a distant land. Are they really entertainers?

I found out I can disconnect emotionally, something I developed as a chidhood form of emotional protection.

What did it feel like, and what did you experience, when you missed someone whom you loved so deeply and had died?